xAERAMx

Its been quite a long time since I last posted.. life seems to have gone in hyper-speed this past year but here I am planning my wedding :D I rarely have time to stop and think about how far I have come from the rebellious teenager I was, but when I do have the time I am always so thankful. I always believed that everything that happened to me would have some sort of positive ending and I have finally found it. I don't mean to say life is easy, but that I am strong enough to be happy with what I have. -Allison Elise

So I haven't posted in a very long time but there is some stuff I needed to write about... My boyfriend brought up the idea that he isn't sure he ever wants kids... I've been raised with the idea that being a mom is just part of life.. not having kids isn't an option in my mind and I'm kind of freaking out. I have no clue what to do, I just feel like eating to much food and crying my eyes out. I finally thought I knew what my future would look like.. I found my dream guy, get along with his family, have a job, but now my future family is in question? so yeah thats all.

So I was laying in bed last night around 1am when I thought came into my mind.  I wanted Samson there holding me. sooooooooo CRAP... It hit me like a ton of bricks that I miss him... We've always had this kind of a connection that we can tell when something is wrong with each other so does this mean he is in some sort of trouble? I don't know.. but it sucks cuz I can't message him cuz idk if im in my right mind.. and there are people that would kill me x.x soo.. yeah.. crap...